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This Weak in Politics, Vol. 222 February 27, 2020 In times of great peril, when our nation faces a scary and quickly evolving health crisis, presidents have risen to the challenge and reassured the nation. This tradition transcends party — whether it be George W. Bush speaking of AIDS: “Like many of you, Barbara and I have had friends who have died of AIDS. Our love for them when they were sick and when they died was just as great and just as intense as for anyone lost to heart disease or cancer or accidents. There is only one way to deal with an individual who is sick: with dignity, compassion, care, confidentiality and without discrimination.’’ — or Barack Obama discussing Ebola: “And it’s typical of what America does best — when others are in trouble, when disease or disaster strikes, Americans help. And no other nation is doing as much to make sure that we contain and ultimately eliminate this outbreak than America.”— US presidents have always offered a calming presence. This week, President Trump continued that tradition: “Well, I don’t think it’s inevitable. It probably will. It possibly will. It could be at a very small level or it could be at a larger level. Whatever happens, we’re totally prepared. We have the best people in the world.” President Trump addressing reporters in the White House as Dr. Anne Schuchat (L) feels humiliation coming on, and Mike Pence (sp?) feels an erection coming on. Then the president told the American people that the threat was essentially over as a result of his leadership and bragged about everything from his handling of the coronavirus outbreak WITHOUT the use of “a czar.” Instead, he used “A-zar.” See what we did there? Truth is, Trump’s leadership — believe it or not — has not been all that steady during the crisis. He initially put HHS Secretary Alex Agarn in charge of the US response to the coronavirus, then he put VP Mike Pence (sp?) in charge, then he put Ambassador Debbie Birx in charge. See? No czar! Health and Human “Services” Secretary Alex It is interesting to note, that while the press conference in which the president declared himself the 21st century’s Jonas Salk was going on, word got out that the US has now had its first case of the virus that can’t be traced to travel or contact with a traveler. So, by sheer will of his leadership, the healing powers of bullshit, and a spineless, sycophantic Republican Party, Trump would have us believe he has already made America great again by singlehandedly doing what the world’s immunologists and epidemiologists couldn’t do — he wiped out coronavirus. Critics say the president’s real concern which drove him to address the nation was not the health of America’s people, but the health of America’s stock exchanges. So, he set out to reassure them. And man, did it ever move numbers. https://ift.tt/32yCekr Feeling as though the situation may actually be more bleak than he was letting on, and that failure could have a political price, did what all great leaders do: he quickly turned the response and responsibility over to Mike Pence (sp?) In other words, Trump washed his hands of the virus (see what we did there?) which he has a habit — or Knack, if you will, for doing. Making it M-m-m-m-m-Mike’s Corona. (Come on, admit it… you are now singing it. ) Note: We didn’t record the song Mike’s Corona due to technical problems. Technically, we didn’t have the skill to sing it. For those of you who wish to sing along, however, we now provide an Ikea-style build it yourself song-maker. If you record it, or if you are Nicolle Wallace, drop us a note to let us know! First the music: https://ift.tt/2TqZEEe And now the lyrics: Despite ALL of this, Republicans were quick to rise to the president’s defense, arguing that the scummy, do-nothing Democrats were making this political, while the president was not. You can always tell when an election year is underway — it’s the one time when Republicans are suddenly interested in healthcare. Prior to this, the closest the Republican party ever comes to healthcare (aside from trying to take it away) is giving Trump’s scrotum a daily sponge bath. Shit. We need to get that sponge bath thing (at least we didn’t say “tongue-wash”) out of our heads. Where were we? Oh yes, the coronavirus response team announcement. In addition to putting a man who doesn’t believe in evolution and who was previously most famous for being in charge of a state that had the worst HIV/AIDS outbreak in the United States over two decades, the president named the following people to his task force: Alex, Robert, Robert, Anthony, Stephen, Ken, Joel, Matthew, Rob, Joseph, Christopher, and Derek, because, you know… ladies can’t science. Seriously, can you think of one woman who has had any sort of positive impact on a major scientific project? And that’s the way the weak spent the week in a nation where a picture of Mike Pence sporting absolutely stunning breasts is NOT the strangest thing we’ve seen. If you enjoy reading TWITPOL please seek help. But please also follow us, “clap” for this story, recommend it, share it, tweet it, and do all sorts of other things the kids these days do. Follow us on Medium.com and on twitter: @sbouchard67 https://ift.tt/2NSvnOH MORON-AVIRUS PLAGUES U.S. was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
