Below is an extract of a post published on Medium titled "Trump’s Controversial NYT Op-ed: “Why Your Great President Must Play More Golf In 2020”"
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Make america great again.- Donald Trump.
What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight. It's the size of the fight in the dog.- Dwight D. Eisenhower.
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.- Theodore Roosevelt.
Discipline is the soul of an army. It makes small numbers formidable; procures success to the weak and esteem to all.- George Washington.
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Via: Medium
Truth In Satire“Tee Time Trump” tells voters why he plans to spend the months leading up to the next presidential election on his golf courses“Working on my handicap is good for the country.” (Credit: www.forbes.com)As seen in Thursday’s New York Times: “A lot of the fake news media questions how much time I spend on the golf course. So I wanted to take a moment from my 23-hour workday to dictate this op-ed to Stephen Miller who will make it sound even more better (sic) after I’m done. “The world sees a relaxed leader who can pummel them all with my putter if I want to.” (Credit: inquisitr.com) There are basically eight or ten reasons, but let’s say six, why I must play more golf as the 2020 election approaches. Keep in mind that when I’m playing golf, I’m only thinking of the good of the country. That says a lot. This says the rest: Your great president strikes a commanding pose with golf clubs in his hands. When I put on my muscle-enhancing, skintight white golf shirt and sleek Haband slacks, and step up to the tee in a handsome presidential pose, the rest of the world says to itself, ‘Look at that great president, playing all day in America. What an amazing leisure vacation spot it must be.’ This drums up a ton of business for golf clubs, resorts, and hotels across the country. Like the incredible Trump National Doral Miami(just click to book a room). So I’m actually giving a huge boost to the American travel industry every time I slip on my golf shoes.“When I sink a tough putt, the other leaders shit their pants, which is a metaphor for power.” (Credit: clickhole.com) 2. Many other world leaders, all of them my great friends, enjoy the game of golf, too, which creates a lucrative bond between us. When I was recently at the G-7 meeting in France (the “G’ stands for golf, by the way), the other leaders told me repeatedly that I ‘teed them off’ — which was their way of saying that they admire my commitment to the game. Many also said that they would love to be in a foursome with me next year at Trump National Doral Miami (just click to book a tee time). That’s why I need to practice a lot between now and when they arrive, so I’m ready to hit the fairways with the great leaders of the world … and come away victorious for the good of America. “Every putt I make is like another brilliant stroke against China.” (Credit: occupydemocrats.com) 3. When I’m lining up a putt, I’m actually planning my trade strategy against China. The cup is China’s economy. The ball is my Chink-crushing trade tariffs. My putter is like a Twitter account with which I launch my tariffs. When I sink my putt, it’s like I’ve just crippled the entire China economy and turbo-charged the US economy at the same time. I can only come up with brilliant trade strategy stuff like this on a golf green. Speaking of golf greens, check out the pristine greens at the Trump National Doral Miami (just click to view!) “Here I am taking a Mulligan over there in Scotland or Ireland, wherever it is that the Mulligan family lives.” (Credit: thetelegraphandargus.co.uk) 4. Golf guarantees that I maintain an amazing relationship with our important ally, Ireland. That’s because every time I’m out on the course, perhaps a beautiful course like that at the five-star Trump National Doral Miami(click to see the perfect location for any international meeting), I take a few of what golf lovers call a “Mulligan.” Golf started in Ireland, or Scotland, one of those, so each time I “take a Mulligan,” I’m paying tribute to the family that created the game, the Mulligans. They just love it over there when I take a Mulligan. Every time I do, they treat me like I’m an honorary Irishman, or Scotsman, one of those two. So you can see how important that is for international relations. “As I’m scampering up this embankment like a mountain goat, I’m thinking about foreign policy.” (Credit: www.huffpost.com) 5. A lot of my best foreign policy decisions get made on the golf course, especially a prestigious club like the Trump National Doral Miami (Prefer pools to putters? Then click to see the Doral’s gorgeous swim facilities!). I have played golf with the leader of Japan — Prime Minister Chintzy Abe. I have chipped out of the rough with the president of China — Xi Jinpinpong. I have played 18 holes (okay, maybe nine holes, they’re boring) with the leaders of a bunch South American countries, can’t remember their names, but they’re down south somewhere. I’ve also let the president of the Tanzania carry my clubs — nice black fellow. Point is, I couldn’t be negotiating these mega deals for America without a round of golf every day. You’re welcome. “Resting with my chin on my hand while waiting for calls from world leaders — very presidential.” (Credit: trofire.com) 6. Golf helps me get a great night’s sleep. And I need to be well-rested to take important calls from leaders who should be admitted back into the G-7, maybe someone like Vladimir Putin, in order to plan historic construction projects (maybe in Moscow) for America. A study at the University of Pennsylvania, my alma mater, showed that a round of golf helps leaders like me get better quality sleep. That’s why golf is my ‘ace in the hole’ when it comes to logging a deep, three hours sleep. And speaking of ace quality clubs, you should consider the Trump National Doral Miami(click with any finger) whenever you’re in Florida. So as you can see, it’s critical that I not stop playing golf during the coming election year. I need to do it for the benefit of all Americans. So you can expect to see me out on the links a minimum of 360 days in the coming fourteen months. I do it just for you and the good of our country.” Sincerely, Donald J. Trump President of the United States and Owner of the Trump National Doral Miami P.S. This is not a paid presidential endorsement for the Trump National Doral Miami. **** Thanks for reading. You can find more from me here and here. –AI Trump’s Controversial NYT Op-ed: “Why Your Great President Must Play More Golf In 2020” was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
