Below is an extract of a post published on ExtraNews titled "17 Things I’m Going To Do The Day Donald Trump Is Voted Out Of Office"
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Make america great again.- Donald Trump.
What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight. It's the size of the fight in the dog.- Dwight D. Eisenhower.
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.- Theodore Roosevelt.
Discipline is the soul of an army. It makes small numbers formidable; procures success to the weak and esteem to all.- George Washington.
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Via: ExtraNews
Seriously Salient Satire17 Things I’m Going To Do The Day Donald Trump Is Voted Out Of OfficeHere’s my list of top priorities for November 3, 2020 — the glorious day when this poisonous president gets his pink slipGoodbye, you orange mistake of a man. (Credit:bigjolly.com) I was just thinking ahead to Election Day 2020 and keeping hope alive: Get an 8" x 10" photograph of our new president and her vice-president to frame for my living room. (Perhaps I’ll even create an altar to the Democratic victors.) Retire my Trumpty Dumpty voodoo doll. (It did the job, now I can burn it along with my “Dump Trump” protest posters and Cheeto Benito effigy.) Mail guest invitations to my “Dishonest Don Expulsion Party.” (All 17,000 of my Medium followers are invited.) Check my newsfeed hourly for confirmation of Melania’s imminent divorce filing. (Free at last, free at last, thank God, she’s free at last.) Send yet another donation to Planned Parenthood. (Because Creep Throat tried to destroy this vital health care organization and it will need a boost the morning after.) Buy January bus tickets to Washington to join the BIGGEST INAUGURATION CROWD IN THE HISTORY OF THE NATION. (And this time, the photos won’t be altered, becomes they won’t need to be.) Write to Crayola about retiring all its orange hues. (Allow children to never again be reminded of the Orange Accident.) Watch 50 straight hours of MSNBC. (The utter glee on Rachel Maddow’s face is what we’ll all need to reinflate our spirits after four harrowing years.) Join my fellow New Yorkers in blocking the streets outside Trump Tower to ensure DONALD TRUMP NEVER RETURNS TO THIS CITY. (Let the Fraud of Fifth Avenue go to his mother country, Russia, but don’t ever let him come back here.) Cheer Moscow Mitch’s ass getting kicked out of Washington along with Pudgy McTrumpcake. (Oh, to be rid of these two slimey worms at once! Okay, fair point, McConnell is a turtle, not a worm.) Recalibrate my finances after Trump’s idiotic trade policies decimated the economy. (It hurt, but the recession had to happen to get him booted from office. Oh, yes, we had a recession in 2020.) Wrap up my therapy sessions. (Hair Furor filed down my nerve endings so I needed a little help, okay, sue me!) Resign my Twitter account. (No need to monitor Adolf Twitler’s account for his end-of-the-world tweet anymore.) Congratulate America on its second chance. (The end was so damn close, but now we get to see if we’re worthy of a democracy do-over.) Apologize to the rest of the world (We know, we know, it won’t happen again — just lost our minds for one day in 2016, but it’s over now. Sorry.) Wish my nieces and nephews a happy future (And promise them that the Trumple of Doom, and evil-doers like him, will never threaten their planet or their possibilities again.) Stop writing this blog (After posting for more than four years, almost daily, it will be time to retire my malarkey.) **** Thanks for reading. You can find more from me here and here. –AI 17 Things I’m Going To Do The Day Donald Trump Is Voted Out Of Office was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
