Below is an extract of a post published on ExtraNews titled "Cohen of Silence No Longer"
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Via: ExtraNews
This Weak in Politics, Vol. 171 February 28, 2019 What a week! Both Dumb and Dumber were out of the country trying to break things overseas, while back home, the president’s former fixer made the earth-shattering, astounding observation that Donald Trump is a dishonest, selfish, lying conman. Whoa if true. The House Oversight Committee this week held open testimony with Michael D. Cohen, with both sides retreating to their normal places — the Democrats were trying to save the republic, and the Republicans, chagrined by the whole fiasco, were merely trying to save race…err face. In a sign that the hearing was going to be a partisan free-for-all, Democrats swore Cohen in with the traditional “Do you swear or affirm that the testimony you are about to give will be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?” while Republicans opted for the “Do you swear or affirm you aren’t going to write a book or make a movie?” While Cohen is a very typically quiet, shy, withdrawn Long Island born lawyer/taxi medallion owner, he decided to come out of his shell this week, laying out a damning tale about the president. The reception to Cohen varied depending on which side of the divide one is on. If you are a Republican member of the House Oversight Committee, Cohen was about as welcome as Sharia law in Salt Lake City (or ‘Sal Tlay Ka Siti’ as the Mormons say it). If you are human, you saw a scoundrel, but a scoundrel who credibly accused the president of lying under oath, conspiring to commit and cover up felony campaign finance violations, having knowledge of the Wikileaks dumping of hacked emails before it was public, approving the infamous Trump Tower meeting with Russians, and added that the president was a lying, deceiving, racist, selfish, win-at-all-costs conman who, if not re-elected in 2020, would be unlikely to allow for a peaceful transition of power. Republicans on the committee responded, as is their constitutional duty to do so, by accusing Cohen of wanting to write a book. So to recap, Michael Cohen was credibly accused of being a liar, Mark Meadows was credibly accused of being a racist, the President was credibly accused of being not just racist, but also a criminal, a liar, a tax cheat, an insurance fraud, and an all-around douche. Yet the ire of the political right stayed firmly focused on a member of congress who has been credibly accused of dancing in pure bliss as a student. https://ift.tt/2ITXdrI Throughout the hearing, Chairman Elijah Cummings and soon-to-be-inmate Michael Cohen were often singing off the same song page — making it difficult to tell if the hearing was Cumming or Cohen. (Yeah, that worked better in our head, but since we typed this much of it we feel sort of pot-committed at this point). Freedumb Caucus member Mark Meadows sought to prove the president isn’t racist by showing that one of the president’s employees is black. My God how we wish we made that up. When a MOC (member of color) pointed out that that act itself may be racist, Meadows became indignant, suggesting the member actually called him racist. He settled down when the allegation was downgraded from “he’s racist” to “he’s racisty.” The whole fiasco did have the upside of leading to an awkward moment when chairman Cummings revealed that he and Meadows were best friends, a scene we’ve opted to memorialize in a video we like to call “The Courtship of Meadies Father,” because 4 people will get it. https://ift.tt/2Tu6Stv Trump and Vice President Mike Pence(sp?) left the country during the Cohen testimony, with Trump going to Vietnam and Pence went someplace — no one knows where, we were just all glad he was gone. As for the president, his trip was the second summit with North Korea’s Kim Jong Un. Trump’s summits, this one included, have turned out so typically, well…Trumpian that they should be officially licensed and branded. Trump often brags about the tremendous relationships he has created with world leaders, most notably Kim Jong Un, Rodrigo Duterte, and Kim Jong Un. That was unfair. Trump also has a tremendous relationship with Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad Bin Salman, who, while technically not a world leader, is truly a killer on the world stage in his own right. In truth, many countries do seem to have some sort of soft spot for the Trump administration — and knowing Trump’s penchant for giving names (Rocket Man, Angela Merkel, Juan Trump, Justin from Canada), many nations have also given nicknames to Trump and Pence. Here’s a sampling: In Saudi Arabia, Trump and Pence are known by the Arabic names Faquad and D’Iq-wad. In North Korea they are known as Hahahahahahaha In Canada they are known as Asshole and the other Asshole (sp?) In France, where the language is a real art, they are known as “Les stains du Shit des Etas-Unis.” While all this was going on, Trump made his first trip to Vietnam since being diagnosed with having feet or something. He met with the man he loves, a man he likes to call Kim Jong Mmmmm. Now, we aren’t going to say Kim, as well as other leaders, has played Trump like a fiddle, but let’s just say we’ve begun calling him Itzhak Jong Perlman. Maestros performing Cosi fan dotard In domestic news, before Trump left for his tryst with his North Korean lover (whom we should report jilted him without so much as a peck on the cheek), he declared to a gathering of governors that his daughter Ivanka was not getting the credit she deserves for “creating millions of jobs,” bragging about her hands on approach, saying she’s “been very much involved.” Speaking of “hands on” and jobs, New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft this wee…What? too soon? We were simply going to say that with the success of his franchise, he too has created many jobs in Foxboro, Massachusetts. Geez lighten up. Some stories really do have a happy ending. Come on. Okay, fine…it was probably premature for those types of jokes, so we will just resort to one final leading fiddler photo before closing out. And that’s the way the weak spent the week in a nation where just a few years ago we were dreaming of a post-racial America, and today we have elected officials trotting out black women to prove they aren’t racist. When the nation called for giving African Americans their props, I don’t think we meant it literally. If you enjoy reading TWITPOL please seek help. But please also follow us, “clap” for this story, recommend it, share it, tweet it, and do all sorts of other things that the kids these days do. Follow us on Medium.com and on twitter at @sbouchard67 https://ift.tt/2NSvnOH Cohen of Silence No Longer was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
