Below is an extract of a post published on ExtraNews titled "“I Only Tamper With Female Witnesses,” Trump Has Told Aides"
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Via: ExtraNews
Truth In SatirePresident seems to be conflating his interest in groping with a federal crime that will likely result in his impeachment“I love to watch good tampering, but I’d rather participate,” said President Trump. (Credit: www.express.co.uk) When told that recent acts, tweets, and public comments he has made could constitute “witness tampering,” President Donald Trump apparently told aides “I only tamper with female witnesses and it’s kind of hot. Before I took this job, I used to tamper a lot, all the time, with some really great-looking broads.” It appears that the Groper-in-Chief is also the Tampering Tangerine Tornado. (Credit: http://bit.ly/2aJ69x2) Several times the president was told not to say that witness tampering was “hot,” “sexy,” “coochie-coochie,” or “arousing,” but Mr. Trump continued to conflate the term with his sexual proclivities and would not be deterred. “Sure, I like to witness and watch good tampering, but I’d rather get involved personally,” the president remarked. “Why spy on two people tampering when you can get in there and grope and fondle yourself? That Stormy Daniels, I don’t like to talk about her much anymore, but when it came to tampering that girl could really fiddle and felate.” Trump says he tampered with Stormy Daniels until he was blue in the face “and other places.” (Credit: http://bit.ly/2aJ69x2) His confusion about the term “witness tampering” is a growing problem, as the criminal act might ultimately bring his presidency down. New revelations have surfaced in recent days that Mr. Trump tried to tamper with many of the witnesses who spoke with special counsel Bob Mueller and various Congressional oversight committees. Asked about this, the president said, “Look, if Mueller wants to get a taste of tampering, more power to him. I just don’t want him coming around trying to get in on my X-rated stable of tamperees. Those naughty girls are mine, period.” **** Thanks for your claps. Always appreciated. I read all your comments and answer as many as possible. Go here or here to read two popular past posts. For my original Trump-themed book of satire, visit allanishac.com. More Trump humor at allanishac.com. “I Only Tamper With Female Witnesses,” Trump Has Told Aides was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
