Below is an extract of a post published on ExtraNews titled "Trump Says His Trade Truce “Will Keep Prices Low On Tons Of Chinese Crap”"
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Via: ExtraNews
Truth In SatirePresident announced good news for consumers “who love buying lots of cheapo Christmas gifts at rock-bottom prices”President Trump’s latest half-assed gambit will keep low-quality Chinese products flooding the American market for the time being. (Credit: www.ejinsight.com) With a trade war temporarily averted, President Donald Trump congratulated himself and assured American consumers that they’ll be able to continue getting China’s inferior products and third-rate holiday gifts at bargain rates. “Thanks to my friend Xi here, lots of Chinese crap will be cheaper than ever.”(Credit: www.voanews.com) “I know Americans love getting their poorly-made Chinese crap at rock-bottom prices,” said Mr. Trump. “That’s why I made an amazing deal with my good friend Xi so all junky toys, cheapo cosmetics, and shoddy electronics products will be available at cut-rate prices this Christmas.” A trade war would have meant that beloved holiday items like Play-Doh, Hanes underwear, Brach’s candies, Etch-a-Sketch, Radio Flyer sleds, anything Mattel, and highly breakable remote-controlled cars and robot toys, all made in China, would have cost significantly more. “This guy is such a gullible jackass,” thought President Xi Jinping. (Credit: cnbc.com) “I’m happy to say that this trade truce will be especially lucrative for my Trump Collection of men’s clothes,” added the president, “and I know Ivanka is pleased that she’ll be able to avoid higher import costs on her swanky stuff, too. We call it a win-win for the family.” The president said that he hopes his trade truce will lead to a more long-term deal in 2019, but added that he will make “a final determination about how to handle China after I check my poll numbers in the new year.” **** Thanks for your claps. Always appreciated. I read all your comments and answer as many as possible. Go here or here or to read two popular past posts. For my original Trump-themed book of satire, visit allanishac.com. More Trump humor at allanishac.com. Trump Says His Trade Truce “Will Keep Prices Low On Tons Of Chinese Crap” was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
