There’s Got To Be A Mourning NAFTA



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Donald Trump
Make america great again.
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Dwight D. Eisenhower
What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight. It's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower.


Theodore Roosevelt
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.
- Theodore Roosevelt.


George Washington
Discipline is the soul of an army. It makes small numbers formidable; procures success to the weak and esteem to all.
- George Washington.



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This Weak in Politics, Vol. 146 August 30, Year of OH MY LORD 2018 Note: Many new readers have asked how to pronounce “TWITPOL.” It’s like TWITPole. With a long o. Because, let’s be honest, everyone loves a nice long o. While much of the nation paused to mourn the passing of Senator John McCain, President Trump continued doing his job — watching television, attacking companies, giving Jefferson Beauregard Sessions, III gigantic public wedgies, and tariffing the living shit out of just about everything. You may recall that Trump, fresh off his victories in North Korea, Helsinki, and the Battle of Bowling Green, signed an agreement agreeing to try to reach an agreement with half of the countries he needs to agree with — or as Trump put it, he completed “the largest trade deal in the history of our country.” For those that are unaware, while campaigning, Trump promised to blow up NAFTA because Clinton. Prime Minister Trudeau has not signaled any intent to revisit the now decades old pact, so Trump so far has only spoken with Andres Manuel Lopez Beauregard Obrador, III. When told he needed to get on the phone with the new Mexican president, Trump said “New Mexico has a governor, not a president.” Sadly it is the most factual thing he has said since becoming president. But in honor of the late Senator, we will begin in Arizona, the state that invented canned iced tea and was raised by Nicholas Cage (as opposed to every movie he’s been in since, about which could be said “was razed by Nicholas Cage.” He’s like the James Woods of acting). The late “actor” James Woods First, some electoral news from McCain’s beloved, adopted home state. Sally McMartha bested Kelli “Nut” Ward and Joe Apardon in the race to succeed Jeff Flake in the United States Senate. While McMartha was once viewed as a liberal (because she voiced mild disappointment at the recording of then-candidate Trump saying he likes to grab women by the pussy), she upped her game in the waning days of the campaign, proving to be sufficiently unglued to win the GOP nomination. This was not an easy task, as one of her opponents, Ward, voiced her view that McCain’s cancer was timed to harm her campaign. In any event, McMartha may well struggle to fill the flip-flops of Flake. Note: We’ve been told the Republican nominee for the US Senate from Arizona is actually named Martha McSally, not Sally McMartha. We’re sorry for the McSup. McCain, McSally, McGahan, and Donald Trump Oops we forgot one picture from that last set of images: Joe McCarthy Former Vice President Joe Biden (remember when we actually thought he occasionally made verbal gaffes?! Ha! Good times. We were so young and naive then) went to Phoenix to remember his friend, John McCain, about whom he said, “We shall not see his like again.” President Trump also remembered John McCain, saying, “Yeah, I remember him — he’s the sad, non-hero Senator who killed my effort to kill people’s healthcare.” Later this week, about ¼ of the US Senate will make their way to the Naval Academy to honor Senator McCain. Several members of the Trump administration will also go to Annapolis to make sure he is really dead. It remains unclear if Kellyanne Conway and a couple of cabinet officials will charter a flight from DC to Annapolis. Speaking of administration flights, White House Counsel (or Councel, if you are President Trump or in the 3rd grade), Don McGahn was the latest to “announce plans” that he intends to flee the White House soon. McGahn says he plans on spending more time with literally anyone who isn’t Donald Trump. The news of McGahn’s departure is reported to have caught McGahn off guard. He may have actually been “resigned” by Trump, likely because of the Russher thing. Rumors have it that Ivanka was the driving force behind his ouster. For his part, Trump says he has always liked McGahn, fell short of laying the blame at the feet of his daughter (we were going to make some sort of joke about “laying” and “his daughter,” but he’s the President of the United States, and he deserves much better treatment than to have people constantly remind one another that he wants to date his daughter). Trump claims the story that Ivanka was behind the move is fake, fake, disgusting fake news. Though he did add about Ivanka, “I don’t know what it is about her, but sometimes I swear it’s like she has a mind of her own.” The departure of McGahn is viewed by some as Rudy Giuliani gaining even more power inside the White House. If Rudy Giuliani ups the quality of your lawyering, you might want to consider a plea deal. Just saying. Rudy’s new higher-profile role is a case of, as the old saying goes, a rat heading toward the sinking ship. Rudy Giuliani heading in to work McGahn, it has been reported, spent 30 hours being interviewed by Special “Councel” Robert Mueller’s team, or three full work weeks if you’re Donald Trump. As the Mueller probe closes in on Trump and his inner circle, the president has taken to tweeting random capitalized versions of “rigged witch hunt” with multiple exclamation points at all hours of the morning. This raises a question: when Trump says “rigged witch hunt,” does this mean he thinks some of the trials in which people were convicted of being witches were fair trials based on facts and the rule of law? Never mind. Don’t answer that. Unless you are @KatyTurNBC. Finally, Trump this week accused NBC anchor Lester Holt of “fudging” his interview with the president — the one in which he unwittingly admitted to obstructing justice/being a witch. And again, sadly, 35% of the country will believe him. Because Clinton. (Note: by saying Trump admitted this “unwittingly” we have created the impression that sometimes he does things “wittingly.” There is no evidence of this. You can call this White House many things, but “a coalition of the witting” is not one.) And that’s the way the weak spent the week in a nation where we had another mass shooting, and we bet you can’t remember which day of the week it was, which city it happened in, or a single victim’s name. Because 2nd Amendment, cold dead hands, only outlaws will have guns, guns don’t kill people, now’s not the time, blah blah blah. If you enjoy reading TWITPOL please seek help. But please also follow us, “clap” for this story, recommend it, share it, tweet it, and do all sorts of other things that the kids these days do. Follow us on Medium.com and on twitter at @sbouchard67 https://ift.tt/2wwvDbs There’s Got To Be A Mourning NAFTA was originally published in Extra Newsfeed on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.


There’s Got To Be A Mourning NAFTA

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